Instagram Anonymous. [Frosted Zucchini Brownies]

Hi, my name is Nicole and I am an Instagram addict.

[Which by the way if you want to follow me I'm under: nicolehopefully]

Ok, yes, I said it.  I admit it.  I know, I know.  I really, really, really, like Instagram, even more than Facebook [is that possible?]  I always have this guilt inside of me that maybe I'm the Mom that takes too many pictures?  That I can't just go do something without taking 500 pictures as proof that I did it.

And I think I'm guilty as charged.  

I've always been a picture taker, I took photography in high school, back in the day when we developed our film in a dark room in the pitch black hoping we would load the film right and the whole roll wasn't ruined.  My photography teacher finally had to tell me that not every assignment could be pictures of my, "druggie boyfriend" aka Andy.  Although why he thought Andy was a druggie I'll never know, maybe it was the fact that he was in a band, wore a beanie 24/7 & had long hair?

[I've also decided I'm just going to start using my own pictures for my blog instead of random graphics I find.  My blog is mostly for myself and I think it will be cooler to remember what we we're doing at different times than random memes I think are funny that day.  So here's Andy teaching a science experiment for our homeschool co-op the other day.  

I guess I never did listen to my photography teacher, sorry Mr. Allen!]

Besides photography class I would constantly take pictures with my little point & shoot cameras or disposables if those we're on hand.  I would use my allowance to develop rolls of film every week and the ladies at Rite-Aid would ask if I was ok if I missed a Friday developing my pictures.  I don't know why but I have always just loved pictures.  I'm a big memory person I guess, I love looking through old pictures and remembering how horrible I looked, or what we did on vacations, the fun we had that night, old pets that have since passed. [We love you Caboose!]

My room in high school was plastered in photo strips from the old photo booths that had developer in them, if you put your ear up to it you could hear the tray tipping back and forth.  Another thing that's long gone and if I wasn't feeling older before I definitely am now.  Come to think of it, I can't even remember the last time I developed a roll of film myself.  I loved making collages with pictures for the front of my binders and even tonight I just got done re-doing our fridge with all the new Halloween pictures we just took.

I have carted literally thousands of pictures across the ocean and back.  Reminisced about my brother's rat tail, of beach bonfires on the Central Coast, birthday parties where everyone has a drunken grin, pictures of the kid's as they've grown.  Of Andy & I in high school, my favorite of him drinking tequila out of my hair, oh I pray my children are nothing like us at that age! 

So sometimes when I wonder if I'm just going with the fad, if I just like Instagram cause it's popular and I want to be like the cool kids I remember myself as a not so cool kid taking pictures at punk shows, at funerals, and of the things we ate on road trips.  I've never been big on souvenirs, or buying little things to remind me of the places we've gone or the things we've seen but I do love pictures.  Of visits with our friends in Washington, of my Nani's gravestone when I can't visit her there, of my Grandma on Christmas with her 50 year old fur coat in 70 degree weather.  When I miss them they're here with me.

I'll never be a photographer, I'm not good enough at staging pictures, [even tho my cousin and I would hang bed sheets in our room and play "photo studio"] I always miss that perfect shot and I can barely use the auto setting on our awesome Nikon.  

But I promise you, wherever we go & whatever we do.....I will always be there taking pictures. 

Like this picture!

Yummy zucchini brownies I made for Halloween.  I have tried other zucchini brownie recipes and not loved them, made these the other night & they we're a hit!  The frosting is delicious and you seriously can't tell it has zucchini at all.  I will never make another brownie again.

Frosted Zucchini Brownies

[adapted from mommyimhungry.blogspot.com]

1/2 cup Coconut Oil

1 1/2 cups Sugar

2 tsps. Vanilla

2 cups Flour

1/2 cup Unsweetened Cocoa Powder

1 1/2 teaspoons Baking Soda

1 tsp. Salt

2 cups shredded Zucchini

1/2 cup chocolate chips 

Frosting:

2 cups Powdered Sugar

1/2 cup Whole Milk

1/4 cup butter

6 tbs. Unsweetened Cocoa Powder

1/2 tsp. Vanilla

[1] In a stand mixer beat together coconut oil & sugar.  When combined mix in vanilla.

[2] In a medium sized mixing bowl whisk together the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda & salt.

[3] Slowly add flour mixture to oil and sugar on low speed.  It will look crumbly and dry.

[4] With a spatula mix in zucchini and chocolate chips.  Stir well until there are no dry spots.

[5] Grease a 9x13 baking pan and set your oven for 350.

[6] Bake for 30-35 minutes until brownies spring back when touched. 

[7] Let brownies cool completely before frosting!

Frosting:

[1] In a medium sauce pan melt butter on medium low and whisk in cocoa powder. 

[2] Add powdered sugar, milk and vanilla and whisk until smooth.

[3] You can add more milk or powdered sugar depending on how thick you want your frosting. 

[4] Spread on brownies & enjoy! 

A full plate is bound to break.

I've been starting to feel overwhelmed again lately.  God has been so good to us with Andy's new job and the time it gives us to spend together and pursue some things on our own has been amazing if not a kind of new concept.  So, at 7 months pregnant with our 4th child it yet again, feels like a new beginning.  We've just gotten ourselves mostly settled here, about 6 months in and we're TECHNICALLY unpacked while still moving things around, trying to find cheap furniture on Craigslist & finishing walls.......

So I guess I just feel the need to change things up,  I used to [ok, maybe still do] want knuckle tattoos that say "restless."  I just can't seem to stay still and we as a family seem destined for a semi-nomadic life.  Going wherever the wind & God takes us, which is ok by me!  

So I decided to become a college student again.  It's been almost 8 years since I have been in school, and it shocks me that time could pass that quickly.  When I went before it always seemed like a battle between school & work, of which I didn't have enough time for both.  Now I don't have time to go to the bathroom by myself so I'm once again reminded of the ridiculousness of my youth.  And while I have always loved learning doing it without a goal in mind made it hard for me to focus. 

I go back August 20th!  Because of my out of state resident status [errr!] And quite possibly because I will have a newborn baby along with a 6, 4, & 1 year old I decided just to take 1 class this semester.  I am so excited to go back while having a hard time struggling with the fact that somehow it feels selfish?  Maybe, because the past 8 years all I've known is being a wife & mother, and sometimes a Starbucks employee.  To take anything from my family makes me think that I'm not giving them enough.  But I have to remember that this is now my enough, that I love them enough to better myself.

So along with school & being pregnant I also signed up to host The Big Latch On this year to promote breastfeeding awareness and have two doula/birth photography clients both due the same month as me. It will be interesting to see how that all works out!  If I can complete the 2 births before I give birth I hope to be able to send in my DONA certification paperwork by January!

 So I pray for God's strength, my own discernment, and a wonderful husband to help get me to the end of this year!  

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" 

[Matthew 11:28]

And since I've been slacking on recipes, and I live in the great state of Hawaii I bring you a recipe for...

Cast-Iron Pineapple Upside Down Cake!

adapted from www.bigmamashomekitchen.com

Make this whenever you're in the need for a tropical getaway.  And no matter how bad for you I know they are I just can't resist Maraschino cherries.  They just taste fake but they are strangely addictive to me.  When I order drinks at bars, or Shirley Temples when I'm pregnant, I always ask for extra of these.  Ooh....red dye #40 you so tasty.

Cake:

2 Eggs

2/3 cup Sugar

1/4 cup Pineapple Juice

1 tsp. Almond Extract

2/3 cup AP flour

1 tsp. baking powder

1/4 tsp. Sea Salt

Topping:

1/4 cup butter [1/2 stick or 4 tbs.]

2/3 cup brown sugar

1 20 oz. can Pineapple Chunks

8 Maraschino Cherries

Use a 10-inch cast iron.  The batter won't look like its enough, but it is! 

[1] In the cast iron pan on medium-low heat cook the butter & brown sugar together for about 3 minutes or until it starts looking caramel-y.  It's better to underdo it than over do it, like I did the first time, cause it will cook more in the oven.

[2] Drain the pineapple chunks [reserving the juice for the batter] and add pineapple to pan. 

[3] Cook for another minute or two spreading pineapple evenly on bottom, put the cherries wherever you want in the pan. 

[3] In a stand mixer beat eggs, white sugar, pineapple juice & almond extract.  

[4] In a separate bowl sift together flour, baking powder & salt. 

[5] Add to the mixer and beat until batter is smooth.

[5] Pour batter on top of pineapple mixture and bake at 350 degrees F for 25 minutes.

Let cool & then invert!